Can I just say how absolutely wonderful it is to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints? My heart is positively overflowing, and I'm sure this is the shortest blog ever, but I really just wanted to speak (or type) what's on my mind. The gospel is... I don't even know how to describe it. I am so grateful for the opportunity I've had to know the truth! Maybe it's just the Christmas season getting to me :) Either way, I just wanted to take the chance to say how much I love the gospel and how unbelievably blessed I have been to be a part of Christ's true church. I love it, I really do.

One time Me, Wendy (not my mom), and Callie went to Mt. Graham for the afternoon to play in the snow. There wasn't actually a whole lot of snow (which is really frustrating because it snowed on the mountain for 2 days straight after we went up!!) but the whole trip in general was, in a word, sublime. The scenery was gorgeous, being away from the city/college was rejuvinating, and just the overall feel of the day was so needed. It was so awesome.

This was our first stop. About half way up the mountain there's this little place where you can pull over and the most beautiful tree and stream were there! It looks like something off of a postcard doesn't it? We were astounded. But then again you kinda had to be there because everything around it contributed to it's awesome-ness as well.

There's us! Duh. You can see the stream in the background!

We love snow!!!


We played snow-baseball...

Wendy and Callie on the slide of the road! Haha get it? Like "side of the road" but it's a slide?

And a lovely sunset to finish off the day :) It was absolutely fabulous.

Thanksgiving Weekend

So...I went home again for Thanksgiving. It was a crazy weekend, from driving home through the unbelievably thick rain and thunder all the way to singing with my sister at a Farewell (which we rehearsed for on Saturday!) and then skipping out of town less than an hour afterwards! But it was totally worth it. And I made sure to document everything because I knew it would make for a spectacular blog! So here you go. Enjoy. Please. Uhkay!

First off I just wanted to show you some of the stuff I was lookin at on the way home. For some reason that day was absolutely BEAUTIFUL at every turn! Good stuff.

In case you can't tell, that's a chocolate on my pillow, greeting me at my arrival. My parents are so weird :)

Awwww! Look at my big brother with his little daughter. He was singing and playing for her. She chimed in too of course. He was trying to get her to sing the Little Mermaid (or "memetz" as Emma calls them) song but she wasn't buyin it. Later that night tho she marched right over to the piano and started playing "chords" and singing that Little Mermaid song! It was one of the cutest things I've ever seen.

Thanksgiving = game night! We had the Colvins over and Derek brought his woman :) Yes, Derek was actually home for more than 24 hours! Proud day at the Spencer residence.

Sorry this picture is so Myspace, but i wanted to get the dress in the picture. When Chelsea and I went to Texas Roadhouse to eat, a waitress brought her a dress for Winter Formal (she works there too). She tried it on in the bathroom. I thought it was funny.

Aaaand this is what typically happens when we eat at Roadhouse. No more than 3 minutes went by the whole time without one of the workers coming up and talking to her/us. Good times man.

Look at my niece! She's just so smiley!! At least this one likes me :)

Friday night we went over to Chelsea Crace's house to play Rockband! We failed on Livin on a Prayer. Hahaha! Um.... look at the picture again. Wilbur Robinson anyone?

Saturday night we went to watch the movie Australia with Hugh Jackman and Nicole Kidman (hello...why else would I go?). This is a picture of us being sad because I honestly probably cried for the last hour of the movie. And several times sporadically throughout the other two hours. Oh yeah, it was 3 hours long. But VERY good.

All in all it was a very good but CRAZY weekend! Oh I forgot the picture of Ami, Kira, Aaron, and Me at Applebee's! Oh well. We went to Applebee's :) I got to spend lots of time with my friends but LOTS of time with my family too. Quite wonderfully dispersed if I do say so myself. I reeeeeeeeeeally didn't want to come back. I can't even express to you how much I didn't want to come back. But I did so there's no point crying over the past. "There's no use crying over every mistake, you just keep on trying til you run out of cake!" Uhhhkay! Hahaha it's from a song. Honestly. I'm really tired, give me a break. Anyway, like I said it was a great weekend. I can't wait to go home for Christmas break and go shopping at Target with Ericka!!!!! I'll never take a real store for granted again :)

What am I thankful for this Thanksgiving? The lessons I had to learn the hard way since moving away from home. They have made everything so much better :)

Suprise!

SO.... Thursday night Candice comes over to my dorm to talk to me. "Stephenie I'm so homesick and I just wanna spend some time with my parents and I can't wait til Wednesday! Let's go tomorrow!" ........Ok! Sounded like fun to me! So the next day we pack up her car and head home! I love spontaneous...ness...ness... ok. She told her parents she was coming. I did not. I didn't tell a soul! Aren't you proud of me?! Hahaha It was so hard! Anyway, suprised everyone when I showed up to their houses. So worth it. It was probably the best weekend I've had in a looooong time. So here are some of the happenings of my trip home... it was so awesome I just had to share :) Yippie Yay! Uhkay! Hahaha...

How can you NOT have fun with the two of us in the car, right? :) Oh man... I'm suprised I'm still alive.

Ok funny story... I'm driving Chelsea's beast of a car out to the BOONIES for Ryan's bonfire and I'm following Matt Kirkland who is following Tanner Nelson cause I have no idea how to get out there. The funny part: Those guys are going like 65 on the dirt road!! I don't speed! I can't do it! Technically....there was no speed limit. But if there was it would definitely be less than 65! So I, being scared to death, drive at the horrendous level of 55 on this completely dirt road where I can't see ANYTHING because of all the dirt flying everywhere, but I can barely makeout Matt's tail-lights. So I'm trying to go fast so I don't get lost in the desert with just Chelsea, but I can feel, literally, that I have minimal control over this car. She's sliding all over the place on the dirt! I can make her go straight or turn but there was no friction and I felt like I was racing in the Tokyo Drift movie!! It was terrifying. But then we left the bonfire to go get Kira and bring her back and now that I knew my way around I thought I was hot soup and I sped like I was training for the Indy-500!! Sorta :) Now, driving on the Ocean-to-Ocean bridge.... THAT'S terrifying! Especially with a cop at the end :(

Here's my girls! Oh man... I miss my best friends so much! I've gotten to see them the last couple times I've been home but this was the first time since I left in August that the three of us hung out together and it was awesome! I swear to you I was on the verge of tears the whole night. Partly because of how much we'd all changed and I knew it would never be like it was in high school, but mostly because I love these girls so much and I knew that high school or no high school we're still.... ok this is sounding way too much like it needs a daytime Emmy. Long story short: I love them! They're my best friends and it was so great to just sit there and talk and take a bazillion pictures :) Love 'em. Love 'em!

Ok...I know I look very strange, but I think this picture really illustrates the overall summary of the weekend. It was just way relaxing and everything turned out so great and I was so happy just to be with my friends and my family and...yeah it was awesome :)

So there you have it. A lovely insight into the world of Stephenie. It was a great weekend. I can't wait to go back in two days!!! Hahahaha oh goodness...

Time Flies...

Ok so I just wanted to catch everyone up on what's been goin on. If I could sum it up: Lots of nothing and no sleep. Needless to say I'm starting early with my good habits :) No, I am definitely getting good sleep tonight. I found out the hard way that it's really no fun to walk around school for 2 weeks straight getting very little sleep at night. Who woulda thought? Anyway, here's some pictures of what's been hapnin the last couple weeks. Enjoy!


This is what happens after we stay out at Jerry's all night. You'll hear more about Jerry's at the end of this post. That's Courtnie's bed with Leah underneath and Callie perpendicular to both of them. I opted to sleep in my bed. Call me crazy!

Wouldn't be a party without a human vacuum or elephant jousting now would it?! Words can't really explain what goes on in Kaitlyn's apartment, so I figured I'd post the pictures and let you guys figure out the rest :) Oh and that's my good friend Bryan pushing my good friend Tanner holding onto my good friend Wendy's feet. They are insane, in case you couldn't tell.

Ignore the beast with no makeup on. This is Me, my good friend Bryan, and Callie on our way to go stargazing at the football field! The all-knowing Joe Larson took his fancy shmancy telescope so we could see the craters on the moon!! And the stars were awesome, but the moon was alittle too bright. We're gonna try again in a week or so. Right Joe? :)

Cheetos Party!! Notice the 3 ft bag of Cheetos on the ground by Serena. Actually they're from Mexico so they're "Totis" or something like that. Anyway, we watched Kung Fu Panda and Get Smart and we ate Cheetos, Cream Puffs, and white chocolate covered pretzels. Remember those Ericka? Good times... good times.

Here we have our little group at Jerry's (Thatcher's version of Denny's). This happens like...3 or 4 times a week at the most unreasonable hours of the day. Yes, day. It's usually about 2 or 3 in the morning. But so much fun! My roommate, Courtnie, far right, works there so either we go visit her while she's working or just go hang out cause we know everyone there. It's lots of fun. Like I said :)

FYI... I CAN'T WAIT TO COME HOME FOR THANKSGIVING!!!! Not that all this college stuff isn't fun or anything, it's just that... I've got plans (a jam session to end all jam sessions! And Chelsea/Stephenie Day!!) and I get to see my family and Ericka's kiddos and to eat Mr. Gs!!!!! PLUS Thanksgiving is the last holiday before.......CHRISTMAS!!!!!!! So yes, I am stoked! It will be grand!

I Stand All Amazed!

Oh my goodness!! I just came back from one of the most amazing firesides OF MY LIFE!! But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's start at the very beginning. A very good place to start...

Ok. Today was one of the best days in general. We were up kinda late and able to sleep in kinda late because church starts at 1:00. So Me, Keari, and Callie get up at 11:30 to go to brunch. It was very good! Tots, french toast, and ham! I was so happy. Our cafeteria is notorious for its less than satisfactory foods, but not this morning! Then we get ready and go to church. Our Relief Society lesson was on the Second Coming. Awesome subject! And it definitely helped me to feel more comfortable about the topic, which always happens when I have lessons about it. Then Sunday School was completely combined, which was lots of fun. Plus my friend was teaching the lesson and we were sitting right up front and he's such a funny guy so... it was great. Sacrament Meeting I got to lead the music. Nuff said! And of course they were some of my favorite hymns. Master the Tempest is Raging! Awesome! And the talks were really good as well. About agency and choice and accountability. It was good.

After church we were asked to help set up chairs for the fireside. I got to push the dolly with chairs back and forth!! It was totally awesome! I was singing and skipping the whole time cause it was so fun and everyone looked at me like I was crazy but, hey what else is new? 10 minutes later a group of us went to the nursing home and sang hymns to the residents! And we sounded so good!!! It was one of the best things I've ever done. SO satisfying! Then our group hurried home and ate dinner together. Corndogs!!! I mean, come on! Can it get better?! I was soooo happy! AND it was a perfect chilly temperature outside and it was sprinkling! Awesome.

Around 6:30 we went to get good seats at the fireside. Front row baby! And the guys sitting next to me were so awesome and one of them turned to Me and said "Do you realize we are going to hear from an Apostle of the Lord?", which I knew but didn't fully comprehend until he said it. I don't even know what to say about the fireside, it was so amazing. First the Tucson Mission President's wife spoke to us, and she was SO SWEET!! I just wanted to give her a huge hug! And soooo spiritual, of course. Then the President spoke. He bore an amazing witness of the Prophet Thomas S. Monson and the teachings that we recieve from the Prophets. Then Sister Christensen (the member of the 1st quorum of the Seventy's wife) spoke to us. She was so sweet as well and had a smile on her face the whole time! She was just so happy, and she spoke about how important the scriptures are to us and it was very good. And then the moment we'd all been waiting for :) Elder Craig C. Christensen, of the First Quorum of the Seventy, spoke to us. First of all, he LOOKED like a general authority. You could just tell he has so much knowledge! And we can have it too! Anyway, the entire chapel sat there in awe, practically, as he spoke of the Holy Ghost and how much we need Him. Also he assured us that this stage we're at right now IS just a stage, and that we need to prepare for tomorrow today. He said he could see the future in us, and that we need to prepare. Tomorrow is today. I was getting SO tired, because it was just like watching Conference and you know how you get all tired because it's SOOO much spirituality to take in at once? That's how it was. All four of them were just the most amazing people and everything they said was so good and so necessary and I could specifically tell that Sister Christensen was prompted by the Spirit to say something about being who Heavenly Father wants us to be. It hit hard, and of course I was crying through the whole thing! :) It was so amazing! Like I said, I don't know if I've ever been to a more amazing fireside. It was like an AMPM: too much good stuff.

Uhkay! :) So anyway, today was probably the best day I've had since I got to EA. I sat there the whole time at church and was amazed at how much I need the gospel in my life! Every single Sunday I am in awe because of how wonderful it is to go to church and how wonderful I feel because of it! Oh! I love it! So much. Today was just exactly what I needed. I haven't stopped smiling all day. I got to meet new people and SING and hear an apostle of the Lord speak to me, almost specifically. It was such a wonderful day! I couldn't keep it in any longer :)

Viva McCain/Palin!!!

Yippie Yay! I VOTED TODAY!! It was probably one of the most excited and intimidating things I've ever done. First of all, I was so careful about filling in the bubbles correctly because I'm a freak like that. Secondly, I had a nightmare a couple weeks ago that I accidentally voted for Obama instead of McCain!! Talk about horror! And third, I just want to comment on the satisfaction of voting. It was soooo awesome!! I was smiling the entire time I was at the polls and I just kept thinking "I'm voting for the next President of the United States!" It was very exciting. And the best part is I had the most awesome feeling as I was leaving the polls! I just felt so good about what I'd done and the fasting and prayers that were contributed as well and it felt amazing to know that I was letting my voice be heard. Haha ok I know I'm getting alittle too philosophical but in all seriousness it was an amazing experience. Let's just hope the results are what we hope they will be. Me and Callie are going to sleep in the common room and try to stay up as late as we can so that we can keep up with the incoming results. Should be fun! What a good day! :)

McCain/Palin and YES on 102!! Woo!

Update!

Just wanted to give a quick little update about the things that have been going on and the things that have been on my mind! So here we go!...

First, this is Callie, Me, and Candice all decked out at our Homecoming Game. It was COLD and we creamed the other team! Aren't we just the cutest? :)

Now for the unpleasantry... I have a problem with EAC. What is the problem, Stephenie? I'll tell you. IT'S JUST LIKE HIGH SCHOOL!!!! I really enjoy going to school here, I really do. It's so much easier to attend a small school with literally 15 kids in my classes and everything withing walking distance and I have really enjoyed the experience. Unfortunately, small towns have a tendency to remain in a "high school-like" phase for....ever. The town is not necessarily the problem, it's just that when you know the majority of the students at the school...drama is bound to occur. Therefore, I have experienced more stressful drama in my first 2 months of college than I did my entire high school career. 16 girls living in one community. Go figure.

On a more positive note, the Office comes on in about half an hour!!! And.... CHRISTMAS IS ONLY A MONTH AND A HALF AWAY!!!!! Ok like 2 months but still. I CAN'T WAIT!! I get to see all my cousins and eat 12 boxes of Little Caesar's at my Grandma's house on New Year's Eve and play in the snow and be with my BCF and see all my cousins!!!! It's going to be simply divine.

Oh and as a final note can I just say...viva McCain/Palin!!!! I am sooooo excited to vote next Tuesday! I've never been so invested in an election before, but I feel SO strongly about this one. It will literally change our future. I could probably handle Obama as president (YUCK!), but if Prop 102 does not pass I will cry. I will break down and cry. Because you know what that means? I will be homeschooling my children and they will never leave the house. That's why I care so much about this stuff. I just sit there and think "my kids..." Ugh! Sorry for being a downer again but that REALLY weighs on my brain! I don't doubt that McCain could help us so much more than Obama, but my ideal election would be one with Palin for President! Is it wrong that I want McCain to win and then...die? Hahaha Ok I know it's wrong, but Palin is amazing! We'll just have to wait and see I guess :/ Here's hoping.

My Family is the BEST!!

Ok, I understand that i posted just yesterday, but i have to say this! My family, extended and immediate, is the best family in the world!! Ok i'm sorry i'm trying to calm down.

The thing is... I have missed my cousins so much! It's already pretty clear from my last blog that my attitude towards my sister has completely changed, which is FANTASTIC! I have just learned how much I really care about and miss my family. On that note, I have missed my cousins SOOOOOO much since I got to college! Me and my cousins are all very close. Really really close. So I always miss them when I'm not up in Utah with them, but this is a crazy time! Me and my boys (my twin cousins that double as my best friends :) have started college and they both have amazing girlfriends, which is only appropriate seeing as they are the greatest guys you'll ever meet. EVER! But the thing that hurts the most is that I haven't seen my BCF since last New Years. BCF stands for Best Cousins Forever :) Anelise is my soul mate. We have been best friends, or BCFs, since i was 7 years old or so. I've grown up with her and we've had the best time and she is literally my favorite person in the world. Well, she went to college last year and got CRAZY busy! And like I said I haven't seen her since New Years and we have barely talked since then too, until just recently. Thanks to the miracle of Facebook I have been able to talk to her alot more instead of just hearing everything from her Mom. Anyway, she's been going through a tough time making some SERIOUS decisions about her future, and I am SO glad i got to be involved! Of course I love to be in everyone's business :) but it's different with her too. It's really hard to give her the advice she needs, because it means she won't be my BCF anymore, she'll be my MARRIED BCF. But he is such an amazing guy, I almost don't have a problem with it at all. Ok i'm sorry. The point is I just love her so much! And she tells me that she loves me a whole lot too and I'm almost shocked to hear it because there are so many amazing people in her life that it's weird that she thinks so highly of me. Oh man I am totally just rambling now.

Case and Point: I love my cousins, and i LOOOOOVE the relationship we all have with eachother!! I'm currently talking to 2 of my cousins on Facebook and we all just love eachother! And my boys' girlfriends will tell me how excitedmy boys get when they talk about how I'm coming to visit soon and it makes me feel soooooo good. The other night i was talking to one of my boys, Dustin, and I was like "I love you Dustin!" and he said it back and it made me so happy and then he says "You know, you're the only cousin I say that to", which totally made my night! We are all so close and I can't even imagine what it will be like when we're all married and scattered :( I'm fairly certain that we'll still get together all the time :)

Everytime we have a huge family get-together with all the relatives on my Mom's side, I like to take a few minutes to just sit back and watch and think. And every time I get tears in my eyes as the recurring thought pops into my head "If this is what Heaven is like, I can't wait." And then I cry harder, because I know that IS what Heaven will be like! And I can not wait :)

Just to catch up...

Lake Havasu High School plays Mohave High School every year in the "golden shovel game". The golden Shovel (painted gold) is what both high schools used to break ground when they were being built. Whoever wins the game gets to hold onto the shovel for the year, until they play again. It's the biggest rivalry game in the state. Callie and Danielle are from Lake Havasu so they reeeeeeally wanted to go to the game and see their families and stuff, so me and Sandra joined them! It was soooo much fun! That was 3 weeks ago i think.

Aren't we just the cutest?! :)

We were out on the lake for a good 4 hours and it was sooooo much fun! That was an awesome weekend.

Me, Callie, and Danielle decided to take the Spirit-bus to a football game against Pima Community College. Yeah well...our bus started smoking about 30 minutes out of town. LOL! So we went back to the school, where 2 big vans were waiting to transport us to the game. It was totally fun.

The fair came to town this last weekend!! We all had the day off from school on Friday and everything. Me and Callie went for bracelet night on Thursday and had lots-o-fun!

We were originally supposed to go to Disneyland, but things changed and the four of us decided to go to Julian for Applefest instead!! It was totally fun! This is Ami, Kira, and Aaron standing in front of my dreamhouse in some wonderful small town on the way. It just happened to be having a garage sale that day! We couldn't resist :)

We got some good sister-bonding time on our trip :) It was quite the successful day and we had lots and lots of fun. Good memories.

Well that's what's been going on lately! It's been pretty busy up in here, and i'm going to ASU this weekend to hang out with my Brad!! It's going to rock the casbah. But I probably won't post about it til a month later, after Thanksgiving and such :) Christmas is coming!!! Life is good.

Good Times!

What a night! Well it was the whole week, really. Lots of ups and a few significant downs, but it turned out just fine :) Last night we had an institute dance where we were supposed to dress up as a high school stereotype so... I got to be a cheerleader for a night! And it was totally fun. I borrowed Danielle's (far right) uniform and she did my makeup and put curlers in my hair and everything. Fun fun! On a more random note, the girl right next to me, Callie, and Danielle are from Lake Havasu and came to our Youth Conference in Yuma this last year! Now they live across the hall from me. Can it get more ironic?

Also, I put some blonde streaks in my bangs! Well it's on the underneath of my bangs, so you can only catch a glimpse every once in awhile. Obviously they're very faint, since you can even see them in the picture.

Continuing with the good news, I got another niece on Wednesday! Allison Mae Spencer. She's a total cutie and I think she looks just like Jason. You can go to Jamie's blog for more information. I'm sure it'll be up soon ;)

Oo! I have a really good institute moment. Something happened on Wednesday that had me pretty down. I felt like the lowest of low and just really discouraged. Naturally, I really didn't want to go to Institute, but I was like "well... it always makes me feel better and that's really where I need to be". So I went anyway. I felt like I was just kinda there and still really not in a good mood at all. One of those depression moments. They suck. Anyway, we start singing the opening hymn: "When upon life's billows you are tempest tossed, when you are discouraged thinking all is lost, count your many blessings..." I just started smiling the biggest grin and laughing. Way to be obvious, right? I still think it's so funny. Just like that i did a full 180 and started thinking about my blessings and I had a great rest of the night! It was so awesome. The next morning brought back some of those discouraging feelings, but I just kept making lists of how I had been blessed and my sadness was sent on it's way. Music is the best. Needless to say I'm that much more excited to start conducting the hymns in Sacrament Meeting this Sunday!

I had a thought while I was typing that story. Is it weird to anyone else that we use "crazy" terms for our church programs? I mean we have a "ward" and "institute".... Seems a little too coincidental if you ask me :)

Home

The other thing that's been on my mind lately is that the feeling of Home is unreplaceable. I had no idea what I was getting myself into :)

College is not bad. It's actually been quite a relief. I always imagined it would be one huge stress and that i'd be continuously running around like a chicken with it's head cut off because of all the insane homework I'd have. Maybe I just haven't gotten to that point yet and it's still to come, but I've quite enjoyed how relaxing it's been. I've grown quite comfortable in my dorm room, I have great roommates, and everyone here is generally pleasant to be aroung. I quite like it here. However...

I have learned, the hard way, that there is a certain feeling or spirtit in the home that cannot be found anywhere but the home. I was really impressed with Candice's apartment because it felt so home-y, and I wanted that in my dorm too. However, I came to find that although Candice's apartment felt home-y, it was definitely not a home. I don't know how to explain it. All I can say is that I can almost guarantee that I will never be able to match the feeling of my home, no matter where I go. I could live in the same dorm for 4 years and it still wouln't come close.

I miss my home. If there's one thing I've learned from my whole week and a half of being away it's how to appreciate. I appreciate how hard my parents work everyday. I always figured they did things so that we would learn and grow up right, but they really do it solely because they love us and they want nothing but the best for us. I appreciate the people around me that were always cheering me on and helping me when needed. I never realized how much a simple deed could impact me. But the hardest lesson I had to learn was how much I really appreciate my family. I have always loved my distant relatives so much and anticipated being sealed in Heaven together, but I can now say that I love my Mom and Dad more than anyone else. I miss them, and my sister, more than I ever expected to. I'm Stephenie Spencer; I don't need anyone's help, I can do it myself. Yeah, well... I found that I CAN do it myself, but I would so much rather not. All those dumb fights we had! I seriously can't remember what a single one was about. Because I don't want to. I only remember the things I miss about them.

My family and my home are the two things I miss the most and I thought it was about time I admitted it :) Turns out Heavenly Father really does know what he's doing ;)

I made a funny!

Ok so this morning I put on a brand new shirt that still had the tags on it and everything. I took the tag off but there was still a little sticker on it. Luckily I noticed it before I left. It's a large shirt so the sticker has a big L and little words around it saying "large". Anyway, the sticker was right on my boob! So it was like a lable for my large boobs! HAHAHA well i thought it was hilarious. I had to share :)

Friends... uhkay!

Ok. I know i totally posted like 2 days ago but i have been getting home too late at night to write in my journal so... this is a good substitute :)

Being away from home has made realize just how amazing it is to have friends. Since my family is M.I.A. i've had to turn to peers for company/comfort, and let me tell you something: they're amazing. I have met more people in the last 3 days than ever before in my life! And once you meet someone here it's like you're cool for life. That's something i really appreciate about thatcher. Plus there's not really cliques and everyone's just friends with everyone. Good again. The new friends are awesome, but the old ones have proven top of the line as well. First of all, the friends i left in Yuma have been really good about making me feel better about being alone. On my first night here, Brad, Jessica, and Zach all talked to me on speakerphone for a little while, and i thought that was so sweet! Kira's busy but she's been amazing about keeping me up to date with all the juicy stuff as well :) But most importantly, Candice Lundgreen has saved my life. When we were about 10 years old, she and I planned out our college years. We were going to NAU and living in the cabin her parents owned. We didn't talk a whole lot about it, but the day her parents sold their cabin was a sad one :( Who would've guess that she and I would end up at college together, in a completely different town, living across the street from eachother. She has been so nice to me, showing me around and introducing me to people and letting me hang out at her apartment. I picked a good best friend back in 1st grade :)

Anyway, that's what's been on my mind for the past few days. There are more good people in the world than i thought. You just have to keep your eyes peeled.

College Girl!!

What a week!! I spent Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday saying my goodbyes to my friends, which was really hard by the way, and then we left that night for Tucson. There was a crazy rain storm that night too! It was pretty scary. But AWESOME!! Thursday we came the rest of the way up to Thatcher. Oh man it was a long day. I got my ID card, my room, got my stuff loaded in my room, and went to orientation. I was exhausted! :)

That night was kinda hard. I had spent some time with my roommates but not much. I went over to Candice Lundgreen's apartment, which is a few feet away, and hung out there for the rest of the night. When i came back it was time to go to bed. But before and after I went to Candice's, there were plenty of tears. I wanted to call my parents and ask if I could hang out with them for awhile, just so i wasn't completely out of my element. But I knew the time to grow up was now. So i stuck it out. It was hard. I knew that I could call or text the people that care about me at any time, but that was it. I was 6 hours away from them and a drive just to visit is pretty much out of the question. Hence: depression.

The good news is I have done much better today! The morning continued with the tears, but I spent time with my parents, got stuff from Walmart, got a PO box and my books and to each of my classrooms. Plus I talked to my brother and he said i could text him if I was ever lonely :) I got a laptop! So that's been very entertaining, and now i'm going to watch a movie with my roommate.

My thoughts on the matter: I have only technically been a college girl for...2 days. Therefore it wouldn't be right for me to make any judgements yet. However I can tell you how I feel. With any luck, this will be the funnest year for me so far. I only have 4 classes on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and one lab on Thursday, so I don't have to worry about being overworked :) Yay for laziness! And having Candice here will do worlds of good for me. I would be totally lost without her. My deepest fear? Failing a class. Or not even failing, just not doing well. It's soooo much money and i really want a good life, for me and my family. I don't know; I'm just worried about the future i guess. So far everything's alright though. If I keep telling myself it will be good, then it will be good. "It should be so, and it will be so! Oh yeah!" (Who can tell me what DVD that's from?).

So there's my update. Everything is crack-tastic :)

Paranoia

I have a problem. It is concurrent with my soul twin :) which makes me feel a little better but... I still feel like a moron.

Let me give you an example. I text my friend Kira a question. She doesn't answer. I text her again after like 20 minutes. HELLO?! still no answer. I call her phone because at this point i'm a little ticked off so I don't care what she's doing she needs to answer me! Such a brat. She doesn't answer her phone. So i call her house. Nobody answers. She's dead. Not literally but that's the point. My automatic assumption is that she's dead! And this happens all the time! If I'm babysitting for Ericka and she is a half an hour late coming home...she's dead. I just automatically assume that she got in a car crash and i start thinking about how I'm here with her kids and the news will be so shocking to them and blah blah blah. It's horrible!

My question is: am I an emo freak? Is this habit going to affect my behavior for the rest of my life? Lol! And yes, I am fully aware of how retarded I sound. I just needed to verbalize the things that are weighing down on my brain :)